Captain Cosmo Sucks!

The man in the colored tights and cape stepped out before the cameras and faced the crowd of mostly kids, and called out, "What time is it?"

"It's time for Captain Cosmo!" the children all cheered.

"And how does that make you feel?" the man pressed them.

"Colossal!"

"And it's a colossal treat for me to be here." the man primped and struck a muscular pose. "Us heroes have to stay in shape you know. And for me, nothing makes me feel as colossal as eating a big bowl of Captain Cosmo's Colossal Corn Puffs for breakfast. That puffed corn goodness just gives me the energy to fight crime for the rest of the day...."

George followed every word avidly. Captain Cosmo had been on the air since 1951, most of three years now. A direct challenge to the Dumont Network's show "Captain Video and the Video Rangers," it was a pioneer in its blending of real life broadcast and videotaped programming. Captain Cosmo and the other actors had performed their roles as hero and the villains he fought in several smallish programs lasting only about twenty minutes, which was then broken down into five minute segments. This was then padded out into an hour by Captain Cosmo talking with the children, doing some simple dialogue, and, of course, pushing his sponsor's name-brand cereal. Like right now, he was showing the kids the latest "prize inside" which was an Official Captain Cosmo Fan Club badge. The one in Captain Cosmo's hand had been burnished to a high shine and the kids were bug-eyed at the thought of getting one of their very own!

The kids did like the show. George realized that, and so did the sponsor. But that just wasn't good enough. Even creating shows by dubbing new dialogue over scenes from prior taped episodes and splicing them in together to double or triple their output just didn't do it. It was why he'd been sent here. He had two reasons, the station's...and his own.

"But you kids are ready to see me in my latest adventure, aren't you?" Captain Cosmo was whipping the kids up into a frenzy. "Time for me to give old Doctor Despotic a colossal dose of justice!"

"Yayyyyyy!" And the camera cut to the introduction of the first taped segment.

"Watch the monitors overhead." the station manager was saying to the children. You can see it all there just like you were at home in front of your own television set."

"But I wanted to see Captain Cosmo get all colossal in person!" one kid whined. That was one of Captain Cosmo's main powers, the power to grow huge in size. This had been created on the tape by shooting Captain Cosmo against a blank screen, and then matting him into a scene shot in a park, one on a camera which had zoomed in close on one section, then backed up quickly. By matting in Captain Cosmo into that shot, the costumed hero magically grew in size!

His other powers were equally low-budget effects, the ability to make small objects disappear (a combination of a little sleight-of-hand and a lot of freeze-frame, yank the object out of the actor's hand, and start the camera up again), and the ability to place an invisible shield in between him and anyone shooting at him (blanks weren't hard to block, and Captain Cosmo only had to place a hand out in front of him.

"I can't get colossal in here." Captain Cosmo said easily. He had to fend off this request in practically every show, no doubt. "If I got colossal in here, I'd knock a hole right through the roof."

Predictably, the kids wanted to see that even more! Captain Cosmo laughed easily and kept them talking and the kids probably didn't see much of the taped show at all.

When it came to an end, the station manager pointed, and Captain Cosmo started in again, "Well, it looks like Doctor Despotic is up to his old tricks, and this time, he plans to steal a golden statue from the museum. I can't let him get away with that, now can I?"

"No!" the kids all agreed.

That was when Captain Cosmo saw George. The superhero became suddenly an aging actor in colored tights and his shoulders sagged. But he rallied, squared his shoulders, and kept going.

So the old guy knew he was here. George sighed. It fell to the newest guy in the management to come down and do the dirty work on site, rather than typing memos in air-conditioned offices. Even being the station owner's nephew didn't insulate George from that.

The show went on, though Captain Cosmo kept shooting nervous glances at George all the way through, even when he was up in the audience talking to the children, during their answers, his gaze was not on the child, but on George. So were the cameramen, more often than not, and for almost one minute, all the home viewers saw was a bit of the stage scenery with nobody in it. But Captain Cosmo stepped in and brought the camera's eye around and with him and covered the glitch.

Finally, it was over. The kids were herded off to a nearby studio where they'd get milk and cookies and a chance to use the bathroom, and then would be taken back to town and/or their school. The cameramen and others left as well. They'd seen George, too, and knew why he was there.

Leaving him alone with his victim. After all, they'd still have jobs when Captain Cosmo got cancelled.

"Mister...." That was as far as George got when Captain Cosmo walked up to him.

Because Captain Cosmo raised his hand. "No, no!" Captain Cosmo said to him sotto voce. "Never when I'm in costume, and a child might overhear."

"All right, then." George said. "Captain Cosmo." he said. "I'm George Sinclair from the station's home offices."

"Really?" Captain Cosmos boomed in fake heartiness. "Well, it's always good to have a visit from someone from the home office! Would you like me to show you around the set? I could call back the station manager if you'd like...."

"That's not why I'm here." George said. "The station has sent me here because we feel the show needs some updating if it's going to stay on the air. The re-use of the taped footage has helped stretch the budget, but it's not going to be enough on its own."

Captain Cosmo was not only the main actor, he was also the show's main writer and the creative spirit behind his costumed persona. If Captain Cosmo was going to be revamped, he would have to be the one to do it.

"Is the network able to increase my budget?" Captain Cosmo asked.

"A little." George admitted. "Probably not enough without some creativity."

"We could shoot just a few new scenes." Captain Cosmo mused. "A new scene or two in the right place could work marvels on the storylines. For one thing, I could add in some new villains. I've fought Doctor Despotic six times in the last three months. Even for a children's show, that's overdoing it."

"Exactly." George said. "I was thinking myself that we should also give Captain Cosmo some new abilities."

"Such as?"

"Well, Captain Cosmo is able to expand to the height of a six story building." George pointed out. "But he never uses that to fight crime. He always uses it to walk to where he's going in the city and then shrinks back down."

"We had to make me the size of the other actors to put me in the same scene." Captain Cosmo mused.

"But it's your biggest draw." George said. "You use it in your own opening, it's even in the name of your cereal. Captain Cosmo is colossal. You could reach in and pluck out a villain with your fingers, and drop him into a waiting police car."

"That's special effects again." Captain Cosmo said.

"We could rig the actors with wires to lift them up." George said. "And then mat in your arm and hand as you reach in and out."

"I think it'd show." Captain Cosmo protested.

"Not if it was done right. And even if it does, heck, everyone understands. Nobody gets upset at the actors in the live-action shows when they flub their lines. I remember watching the Dumont Network and in a detective show on it, they had a guy get killed and the actor didn't realize he was still on the air, so he got up, brushed himself off and walked off, all within the television camera's view. Everyone laughed, and went on with the story."

"I've tried very hard to avoid any of that on this show." Captain Cosmo said.

"And you do a wonderful job." George said. He was honest about that, Captain Cosmo always knew his lines (he'd written it, after all) and could cover in an organic way. If he'd been the detective on that cop show, he probably would have walked up and shot the guy a second time, for example, then growled, "Now stay dead, damn you!" or something. "It's one reason we want to keep you on the air as best we can. I was thinking that you and I could sit down and come up with some ways to really pump some new blood into this show."

"You and me?" Captain Cosmo said.

"Well...yeah." George said. "I'm working for my uncle, but I want to get into show writing and directing for myself."

"So you want to come work with me on my show?"

"Yeah." George knew he was grinning. "I mean, you have the greatest show, creative-wise, of any now with the station. I mean, what can you do with a detective show that's really new? But a superhero, you have the entire universe to play with. What do you think about introducing aliens into the show, for example?"

Captain Cosmo looked at George, and then he grinned. "You're not just a station supervisor, you're a fan?"

"Of you? Sure." George admitted. "Not just as Captain Cosmo, but everything you've done here."

"And you'd like me to take you under my wing?" Captain Cosmo said, and he put his arm around George.

"Something like that, yeah." George gushed. "God, a chance to work with Captain Cosmo!"

"Of course, for you to work with me, would mean that you and I would have to get a lot better acquainted."

"Well, sure." George agreed. "I did say we need to sit down and start hashing out ideas. And then, of course...." He turned to look at Captain Cosmo, and the famous face was right next to his. And not just in black-and-white, but in full, clear color!

Stunned by that, he was unmoving as the face moved in on his, and the lips kissed his. George was stock-still for the kiss, but when it ended, he was seized by a sudden shivering.

He'd just been kissed by Captain Cosmo! A kid's show superhero, but god! That red, blue and yellow suit was one from his dreams. If he had met the actor out of the costume, he might not be as dazzled as he was, but here, now...God! He'd been kissed by Captain Cosmo!

When Captain Cosmo leaned in for another kiss, George rushed to plant his lips on the other's, kissing with all the ardent and inept talent of a thirteen-year-old kid!

The eyes within the black domino mask were alive, sparkling with lights that came from within, the fire of the soul burning through. The smile was strong, arrogant, but George shuddered under the shine of those teeth, for they claimed George as his own.

"Always glad to meet one of my older fans." Captain Cosmo said, and there was mischief in his voice. "They come along just often enough to keep me interested. You're the first one from the home office, but I'm not complaining."

"It'll be great to work with you." George sighed. "The others at the office, they want me to tell you that they'll cancel the show the end of this season, but we can turn it around by then, you and me, and they can put that damned game show on some other slot. You're too important to the kids to be put out of business."

"Canceling me?" Captain Cosmo was taken aback, but only for a moment. "You're right, a few changes and they won't dare fire me. After all, I'm Captain Cosmo."

"All it'll take is a few changes in the show." George breathed. "And with me to help you, it'll get done in no time. I can arrange for you to borrow other show's facilities, use their props, borrow their actors for bit parts on your show. You and me...."

"Yes, you and me." Captain Cosmo kissed him again. "I'm so very lucky you came along, George. You don't mind if I call you George, do you?"

"No, sir." George said.

Captain Cosmo was stroking his hands down George's body, running his hands over the fine Italian silk business suit, feeling inside the jacket to cup his breasts. Then those hands wandered lower and they cupped something else, something very important, and George could only moan and shiver the more, like a Chihuahua puppy.

"The mark of a true fan." Captain Cosmo approved. "Always they nearly cream their pants when you catch hold of the basket. Now to fish this thing out and see if it blasts me before I even get it into my mouth."

George could only stare downwards, dazed, at his hero kneeling before him, the hands undoing his belt, opening his fly, fishing in his boxers, pulling them down, and then. "Oh, God!" he groaned, and the shiver this time was confined solely to his male organ. He damned near did squirt just at the touch of the big man's hand on his cock!

Captain Cosmo looked up at him, the face wrinkling in a smile again, and he said, "Well done, you held it in. Now, can you keep it in long enough to let me enjoy sucking on it a while?"

"I...I think so!" George gasped.

"We won't make much of a team if you blow all over my face, now would you?" Captain Cosmo chided him.

"No." George admitted. "Ohhhhhh!"

"I think I'd better just touch my tongue to it first. Brace yourself, here it comes."

And the soft tissue laid itself against his glans and the feel was...electrical! Captain Cosmo really did have superhero powers! How else to explain how much raw excitement was racing through his body just from the mere touch of the man?

"Good boy." Captain Cosmo approved when George didn't explode onto his face from that. "Now, I'll try putting my lips around it. That isn't going to make you squirt it, will it, George?"

"I...I'll try not to." George gasped. If the tongue was lightning, the lips were fire! Burning upon him, they drew passion in white-hot lines around his cock as they sank onto his manhood, and wrung his sturdy pillar into charcoal dust as he pulled up on the skin and plied the glans with their velvety caress.

George felt like sobbing, not in sorrow, but in rapture. He had never felt it like this before. The few times before he'd had (with women, by all means, never a man!) were as pale as fake pearls around a housemaid's neck, insignificant next to the multi-diamond-studded extravaganza which was the joy Captain Cosmo provided with his talented lips.

Captain Cosmo was moving faster, now, he was wringing George's prong with his lips on every pass, but now George had found his balance, it was careening on the edge of the abyss, but it was balance, and he could endure it for a time...a while...a little bit...maybe!

Captain Cosmo brought his tongue into play, working it on the underside of his prick while he moved over the shaft, so that every motion was different, pleasure piling upon pleasure, like a stack of blocks done by a child, not neatly arranged and so possibly stable, but helter-skelter, so that they tilted the height and the next block was stacked to counterbalance, and the entire ponderous thing swayed mor and more dangerously, and so George's glory was building in him, not as a grandiose design, but as a dangerous beast raging and about to burst free!

"Oh, oh, UH-HUHHH!" Was that orgasm? No, not yet. George panted heavily, and then "UH-AH-AAHH-AHHH!" No, not yet again! God, this was maddening. Had his climax been buried somehow, lost among this endless ecstasy so that it could not connect to him? Would he be confined to this state indefinitely?

"God, but you're hot." Captain Cosmo admired as he took his lips from the cock and held the slimy spit-covered thing in his hand. "I didn't think you'd last two minutes, and here it's been more than five."

Five minutes? No, it had been an eternity. "I got to come." George groaned. "Please, sir, let me come now, please!"

"No more talk about canceling my show then?" Captain Cosmo demanded.

"No, no, never." George said. "God, no, we'll get it fixed, I promise we will."

"You'll help me make the show even better?"

"Yes, oh, yes!" George cried out. "That's all I've ever wanted!"

"Then all right, you can come now." Captain Cosmo said. And he dove back onto George's cock, and this time the orgasm was there and every motion only built it up stronger, and stronger, and NOW, NOW, GOD, NOW!

"AH-UH, HAH! GUH-HUH-HUNNNNNNNNKKKKHHHH!" George burst into Captain Cosmo's mouth, the famous man drank down the explosion with a rapturous look on his face, siphoning off George's potency, his youthful energy, his power, his position, HIS LIFE!

"Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God!" George whined as his orgasm ended. "Ah-hah, ah, hah, hah! Oh, God, hah, uh, gah!" His breaths were discrete punctuations of air from his lungs, even the intakes were twittering birds of flight into his body, they beat their breasts against his chest cavity and then flew back out again shrieking in their joy to be free again! George felt like he was floating on air, like he was just as powerful as Captain Cosmo was when he fought crime, he was ultra-potent, super-energized, hyper-powerful!

Captain Cosmo stood up and wiped his lips with the back of his hand. "That's quite a load, all right. It's always fun to take on the ones your age. I bet you could do it again in another hour or so."

"Maybe." George admitted.

"Well, first thing you got to do is go back to station home office and convince them to do what you want to do, put some new life into this show and keep it on the air."

"Yeah, with aliens and space travel." George agreed.

"Why not?" Captain Cosmo was practically shooing him out the door. George went, numbly, his brain still reeling. He was driving back to the office before he knew it.

He went to his uncle's office and began his spiel to save the Captain Cosmo Hour. His uncle cut him off after a half-dozen sentences.

"God damn it!" his uncle thundered. "You're the third executive I've sent down there that has come back ready to fight to save that single fucking kid's show! Does he know where everybody's buried the bodies, or is that costumed fairy just so good at sucking dick he manages to change everyone's mind by blowing them?"

"Er...yes, sir." George settled for saying. With any luck, his uncle would never learn just how close he'd come to guessing the truth!

THE END
Comments, complaints or suggestions?
E-mail me at Tommyhawk1@AOL.COM
WWW.TOMMYHAWKSFANTASYWORLD.COM


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